I overheard the following exchange at Earthfare last night between two boys who looked like they were just out of highschool.
"So what's this Marcy was telling me about you claiming to be half American?"
"I never said I was half Amercian...what are you talking about?!"
"Marcy said you said you were half American..."
"Dude! I said I was an AFRICAN American!"
"Oh...."
Just made me giggle...
Thursday, March 6, 2008
Wednesday, March 5, 2008
Jello legs, Busted lip, and Gecko Eggs
It's quiet and all the monkeys are sleeping....whew.
Today I returned to my sleep apnea doctor, and he wasn't terribly impressed with my progress because I'm still exhausted most of the time. So he wants to see me in another 3 months. I walked away with a new type of mask however, which may help.
I went to water aerobics again this evening, and man oh man, do I feel like a lump of jello after that class. The funny thing about water exercise is you don't realize how hard you're working, because you never break a sweat. That is, until later, when you feel like jello...
So then back at home, baby J is toddling down the hall, and D (the 8 year old) decides to stop him and bring him back the room that we were all sitting in. But instead of stopping the toddling monkey, D accidentally tripped him. Baby J hit the hardwood face first. I heard D scream, and about two seconds later I heard the baby scream. You know a child is hurt when initially you hear nothing, the babe's mouth open wide in a soundless scream with a purple face...then comes the deep breath and the shrill scream of pain that says I REALLY got hurt this time. Blood was all over his face and it took me a few minutes to determine where it was coming from. The older two were panicking, and kept saying "he's bleeding...he's bleeding!" Thank you captain obvious! I do have to say that S was a tremendous help once I began giving him orders. "Grab a wet paper towel! Hold his hands so I can look!" All his teeth were intact, but he had busted his lip pretty good. Poor baby, and poor D. He was really hard on himself, despite the fact that it was a total accident.
And in other news, S's female leopard gecko, Sarah, appears to be about to lay eggs. Apparently she was impregnated by her cagemate, Ken. Some of my readers will find this very very humorous.
Today I returned to my sleep apnea doctor, and he wasn't terribly impressed with my progress because I'm still exhausted most of the time. So he wants to see me in another 3 months. I walked away with a new type of mask however, which may help.
I went to water aerobics again this evening, and man oh man, do I feel like a lump of jello after that class. The funny thing about water exercise is you don't realize how hard you're working, because you never break a sweat. That is, until later, when you feel like jello...
So then back at home, baby J is toddling down the hall, and D (the 8 year old) decides to stop him and bring him back the room that we were all sitting in. But instead of stopping the toddling monkey, D accidentally tripped him. Baby J hit the hardwood face first. I heard D scream, and about two seconds later I heard the baby scream. You know a child is hurt when initially you hear nothing, the babe's mouth open wide in a soundless scream with a purple face...then comes the deep breath and the shrill scream of pain that says I REALLY got hurt this time. Blood was all over his face and it took me a few minutes to determine where it was coming from. The older two were panicking, and kept saying "he's bleeding...he's bleeding!" Thank you captain obvious! I do have to say that S was a tremendous help once I began giving him orders. "Grab a wet paper towel! Hold his hands so I can look!" All his teeth were intact, but he had busted his lip pretty good. Poor baby, and poor D. He was really hard on himself, despite the fact that it was a total accident.
And in other news, S's female leopard gecko, Sarah, appears to be about to lay eggs. Apparently she was impregnated by her cagemate, Ken. Some of my readers will find this very very humorous.
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
Monday, March 3, 2008
Chest Pains and Sprinting (though not together)
Once again, it's late and quiet. Except for the 15 month old monkey bouncing around in his crib... but at least the big monkeys are asleep.
I think I'll be able to adapt to this lifestyle for the next few months. Not that I like it or anything, but I'll make it through.
I talk to DK several times a day, the boys do too. I have worked out a regular routine with our sitters...they'll come over in the evenings and wrestle the monkeys while I go out and have some time to myself. I intend to spend most of this time at the Y, getting back in shape. I hit water aerobics tonight and had quite a scary experience... I was pushing myself to my limits, which considering how overweight and grossly out of shape I am, isn't alot. When I got a terrible pain in the middle of of my back. I inhaled deeply and it got sharper. I made my way to the side of the pool and hung on, terrified.
My internal mental dialougue went something like this: "I'm having a heart attack in the deep end of the YMCA swimming pool. Who's going to take care of my kids? Who'll know to contact the sitters and call DK? I should have lost this weight years ago. Stupid stupid...now I'm having a heart attack and my kids won't have a mom! How could I do this to myself, to the kids, to DK? Wait... *stretch* oh... *stretch*....it's just a muscle spasm between my shoulder blades..."
Then I just stretched it out and resumed exercising. But yeah, loosing weight is priority one.
And an unrelated topic: Baby J actually sprinted today. The days of wobbly toddling were certainly short lived. This evening he began fiddling with a power outlet, trying to remove the safety covers and I said sharply "Baby J, NO!" He jumped, startled, and sprinted clear across the room. S, my almost 11 year old, and I burst out laughing. Evidently, he thought no one was watching...
I think I'll be able to adapt to this lifestyle for the next few months. Not that I like it or anything, but I'll make it through.
I talk to DK several times a day, the boys do too. I have worked out a regular routine with our sitters...they'll come over in the evenings and wrestle the monkeys while I go out and have some time to myself. I intend to spend most of this time at the Y, getting back in shape. I hit water aerobics tonight and had quite a scary experience... I was pushing myself to my limits, which considering how overweight and grossly out of shape I am, isn't alot. When I got a terrible pain in the middle of of my back. I inhaled deeply and it got sharper. I made my way to the side of the pool and hung on, terrified.
My internal mental dialougue went something like this: "I'm having a heart attack in the deep end of the YMCA swimming pool. Who's going to take care of my kids? Who'll know to contact the sitters and call DK? I should have lost this weight years ago. Stupid stupid...now I'm having a heart attack and my kids won't have a mom! How could I do this to myself, to the kids, to DK? Wait... *stretch* oh... *stretch*....it's just a muscle spasm between my shoulder blades..."
Then I just stretched it out and resumed exercising. But yeah, loosing weight is priority one.
And an unrelated topic: Baby J actually sprinted today. The days of wobbly toddling were certainly short lived. This evening he began fiddling with a power outlet, trying to remove the safety covers and I said sharply "Baby J, NO!" He jumped, startled, and sprinted clear across the room. S, my almost 11 year old, and I burst out laughing. Evidently, he thought no one was watching...
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
Halfway through my first week on my own
DK is living and working in GA now, and I am in Asheville with our 3 sons. It's too quiet at night after the boys are in bed. These next 3 months are going to be very hard...I have no friends here, though I do have some babysitters I can call on. No one to talk to really. No one's company except the children and the occasional parent or teacher I speak with at their school. Though those conversations are usually very brief and superficial. So now I have to think, when all is quiet, and it's sinking in how much I have been pushing aside greif.
In the last 3 years I have lost the only 3 grandparents I ever knew, 2 friends, and 2 pets. I never permitted myself time to fully grieve any of those losses. I suppose because I didn't want to. I didn't want to feel and I didn't want to hurt. It hit me like a whammy tonight when I was talking to my 8 year old about migraines. I told him that I didn't know of anyone in my family who got them besides me. Neither of my parents, nor my sisters do that I know of. He said "What about your grandparents?" I said "I have no idea." And he replied "Why don;t you call and ask them?" and I told him I couldn;t..they had all died. And suddenly I was choking back tears...and it hit me... Gram, Mama, Papa...all dead. Jay and Meredith...dead. And I realized that I was doing what I'd always done....faced the pain as long as I had to...until after the funeral, and then convince myself that the deceased was on an extended vacation or something.
So now I'm alone in Asheville, with 3 boys to care for, no friends to lean on, and all these suppressed feeling of greif come bubbling up. Great.
In the last 3 years I have lost the only 3 grandparents I ever knew, 2 friends, and 2 pets. I never permitted myself time to fully grieve any of those losses. I suppose because I didn't want to. I didn't want to feel and I didn't want to hurt. It hit me like a whammy tonight when I was talking to my 8 year old about migraines. I told him that I didn't know of anyone in my family who got them besides me. Neither of my parents, nor my sisters do that I know of. He said "What about your grandparents?" I said "I have no idea." And he replied "Why don;t you call and ask them?" and I told him I couldn;t..they had all died. And suddenly I was choking back tears...and it hit me... Gram, Mama, Papa...all dead. Jay and Meredith...dead. And I realized that I was doing what I'd always done....faced the pain as long as I had to...until after the funeral, and then convince myself that the deceased was on an extended vacation or something.
So now I'm alone in Asheville, with 3 boys to care for, no friends to lean on, and all these suppressed feeling of greif come bubbling up. Great.
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
DK moving back
We are gearing up for DK to move back to GA to begin working on Monday. We promised the boys they could finish up the school year here, so I'll be remaining here with the kids. There is more stress brweing around here than anyone should have to deal with.
DK is stressed, I'm stressed, kids are stressed. Baby J is blessfully unaware. I'm trying not to let on how anxious I really am, but I am. I have no support system up here really. I have 2 very sweet ladies who help me with cleaning who will also help me with babysitting...which I am very thankful for. I enjoy their company immensely..very cool people. But that's about it.
Not to mention I'm now insane about personal safety and locking the doors and so forth. I double check them multiple times before I can fall asleep. I used to take for granted that my little corner of the world was safe and nothing really horrendously bad would happen. I have lost that sense of safety.
My friend, Meredith Emerson, was abducted and murdered about 6 weeks ago. I haven't had a decent night's sleep since then, and I expect it'll only be worse once DK is spending the work week in another state. I usually hold together very well during the day, but at night when the house is quiet and I'm alone with my thoughts...that's when it's really hard.
I'm rambling... I'm hoping I can begin posting more upbeat things soon.
DK is stressed, I'm stressed, kids are stressed. Baby J is blessfully unaware. I'm trying not to let on how anxious I really am, but I am. I have no support system up here really. I have 2 very sweet ladies who help me with cleaning who will also help me with babysitting...which I am very thankful for. I enjoy their company immensely..very cool people. But that's about it.
Not to mention I'm now insane about personal safety and locking the doors and so forth. I double check them multiple times before I can fall asleep. I used to take for granted that my little corner of the world was safe and nothing really horrendously bad would happen. I have lost that sense of safety.
My friend, Meredith Emerson, was abducted and murdered about 6 weeks ago. I haven't had a decent night's sleep since then, and I expect it'll only be worse once DK is spending the work week in another state. I usually hold together very well during the day, but at night when the house is quiet and I'm alone with my thoughts...that's when it's really hard.
I'm rambling... I'm hoping I can begin posting more upbeat things soon.
Friday, February 15, 2008
Month from hell
January sucked....and that is the grandest understatement I have probably ever made.
I lost a friend, and the world lost an amazing person. I lost my sanity for a while there. My husband lost a job. And my children lost their sense of innocence and security in the world. That was January...in a nutshell I guess.
Things have to go up from here...they just have to.
I lost a friend, and the world lost an amazing person. I lost my sanity for a while there. My husband lost a job. And my children lost their sense of innocence and security in the world. That was January...in a nutshell I guess.
Things have to go up from here...they just have to.
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